Asian students always seem to rise to the top, out-performing students of all other nationalities. Not only are they more likely to graduate high school and go to college than their Western peers, but they’re also more likely to get into elite colleges and go on to high-paying careers. At least one explanation for the success of Asian students lies in Asian parenting practices. By teaching the following core values, Asian parents help their children succeed in school and in life.
1. Education
Asian parents prioritize education and make any sacrifices necessary to ensure that their children can attend a high-quality school, like The Perse School. They also make sure their children reap the benefits of good schooling by supervising their homework and helping them study, sometimes for hours each day. Asian parents often sit with their children while they do their homework and provide extra materials or hire private tutors if their children seem to struggle. In addition, Asian parents typically discourage or even forbid any activities that might interfere with studying, such as socializing or playing sports.
2. Hard Work
Western parents tend to think that being intelligent is an inborn trait, like having blue eyes or being right-handed, whereas Asian parents value effort over innate ability. If a Western child performs poorly on a test, Western parents are likely to assume that the child’s strengths lie elsewhere. An Asian parent is more likely to assume that the child just didn’t try hard enough. Consequently, Asian parents accept no excuses for poor performance. Instead, they push their children to work hard and overcome their frustration.
3. Achievement
While Western parents place a high value on self-esteem and tend to praise children liberally, Asian parents save their praise for only the highest results. That’s because Asian parents believe that self-esteem results from achievement. By keeping their expectations high, they encourage their children to push themselves to get 100 on every test and to win every academic competition. While Western children are motivated by praise, Asian children work harder when they receive criticism.
4. Family
Asian parents are known to be strict and demanding, but they also tend to have close and supportive relationships with their children. Even though parents put a lot of pressure on their children to succeed, they also provide virtually unlimited support in terms of time, attention, and resources. Furthermore, the support that flows from parents to children continues long after the children finish school. Parents often help their children purchase a home and pay for the next generation’s schooling. As parents age, they can also count on their children to care for them.
5. Respect For Elders
Another value that Asian parents transmit to their children is respect for elders. This value is rooted in Confucianism, a philosophy that emphasizes hierarchies in human relationships. According to the principles of Confucianism, a child’s role is to respect and obey their parents, grandparents, and other elders, especially their teachers. Consequently, Asian children tend to accept their parents’ rules and obey their teachers more readily than Western kids do.
These five core values infuse Asian parenting, and they support the development of strong, resilient, and successful children. Asian kids may feel that their parents put a lot of pressure on them, but they also know that their parents believe in them one hundred percent.
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