When you have the answer privilege of growing a baby, your entire body changes. On a cellular level, your body is going to be different to your very core, so why do so many mothers hate what they look like after they have given birth? We already know that there are pressures on us from a societal point of view to look a certain way in general, but when it comes to having a baby, we are all pressured to lose all of our baby weight and look as good as possible as quickly as possible after birth.
Learning to love your body even before having children is hard enough, but learning to love it after your children are born is a whole other ball game. Learning how to love your body when you really don’t is not easy. You will find yourself trying to figure out how to fix uneven breasts, or Googling which oils will work on stretch marks. Once you’ve done that though, you realize you end up paying for lotions and potions and surgeries to fix something that maybe wasn’t broken in the first place. There is nothing wrong with getting cosmetic surgery. There is nothing wrong with fixing something you would like to fix.
But it doesn’t cure the issue. You could have all the plastic surgery in the world and all that will happen is that you find new ways to be dissatisfied because you’ve never learned to love what you have. We’ve got some tips below on how you can learn to fall in love with your own body.
Commit to falling more in love with it.
The fact that you acknowledge that you want to change how you see your body is how you begin. The first step to changing the way in which you feel about your body is to look at how you are feeling about it and commit to making a new change. Changing your thinking and changing the way in which you look at yourself is important. Tell yourself that you want to have a positive relationship with your body and make sure that you mean it. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that reframing your thinking is going to make a big and positive difference to you overall.
Stop believing that change will make you happier.
How do you know that change is going to make you happier? Is it because you think change is something that you want or is it because you think that change is going to magically change your mindset? Honestly, changing your body is not going to change your mindset whatsoever, because your mindset has to become your priority before you make any physical change. We also have this idea that looking a certain way is going to bring us the approval that we are seeking, but it’s about who you are as a person and not who you look like that counts. Looking a certain way will not make you happy, and thinness doesn’t equal health. There are plenty of people out there who are extraordinarily thin but aren’t necessarily healthy in their bodies. Instead of equating your weight with your happiness, you need to consider everything else around it. The more you internalize the idea that you can’t love yourself, the less you will be able to do it.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
One of the worst things that you could do is compare your body to that of other people. If you want to learn to love your body, you need to stop judging others Against yourself. Other people’s bodies are not a yardstick for which yours should be measured against. When you criticize the way another person’s body looks, you are sending a message to yourself that you value somebody else based on their shape. You have to remember that the first thing that comes to mind when you see somebody of a different body type is what you’ve been conditioned to think. What comes next is what you actually believe. Don’t compare your body shape to that of somebody else because all you’re going to do is make yourself feel depressed. Photoshopping and airbrushing has a lot to answer for, so put down the magazines and start looking in the mirror.
Step away from social media.
Depending on your age, social media may not be much of a factor in your life. However, who you follow can influence your thinking. Cleanse out your account so you are no longer following celebrity social media accounts or model social media accounts that make you feel inadequate. You have to remember that it’s not the problem of the model or the person in the picture if you are the one comparing yourself. They are always going to have that shiny, glowy look about them but those looks that you pore over in those pictures take hours and hours of time. Nobody has perfectly flawless skin. Nobody has perfectly hairless legs. Linking your own opinion of your body to unrealistic body types is going to control you and you are the person in control.
Look for bodies that look like yours.
One of the best things you can do for your mental health and your perception of your own value in your body is to look for other bodies that look like yours. If you wear a plus size, then start following influential people who are the same size as you. You can also follow celebrities and models who are the same size as you because curating your media consumption can really help your psyche.
Stand in front of the mirror.
It’s so important that you get to know your body on a deeper level. If you’ve gone through the process of pregnancy and giving birth, then you will be more in tune with your body than most people are. You’ll know every contour and every stretch mark, every wrinkle in every lump of Cellulite. When you are familiar with your body’s language, not the language that you express in your posture, but the way your body feels, you’re going to start becoming more compassionate towards it. For example, if you are a person who has menstrual cycles, then you need to understand how that makes your body feel on a cyclical basis so that you can get to know what your hormones do and when you bloat and when you feel like the world is ending. Standing in front of the mirror and scrutinizing your own body but in a positive way is important so that you can feel more empowered.
Remove Unhealthy Substances
One of the best ways of being able to improve your love for your body is to work on removing any toxic and unhealthy substances from your body. Predominantly, this means you need to kick (or at least cut back on) those unhealthy habits. For instance, cutting down on the amount of alcohol you drink, or the number of takeouts you have, is one of the best ways of being able to show more care to your body, and this is something you have to think about. Another thing to consider is cutting down on smoking, and removing cigarettes entirely, in favor of products like black cherry Zyns, and other tobacco pouch products.
These are some of the best ideas you can use to help you take steps that will allow you to care for your body more effectively, and this is something that you need to focus on. Looking after and loving your body is going to have a big impact on your mental and physical health, and this is really important to get right.
Make your body feel good.
You should make it a habit and even put it on your calendar that you do something good for your body every single day. Whether it’s a few minutes for a manicure or you put your feet into a spa, you need to train your brain to associate what you do with your body with positive feelings. Showering your body with love will help it to feel more natural overtime. Loving your body takes time and it takes work, but it’s not impossible. It will take a lot of time for you to get your head around the idea that your body deserves good things, but your body is keeping you alive. Your legs, no matter their shape, are keeping you standing. Being thankful for that is important.
Nourish your body.
If you want your body to respond well to illnesses and situations that feel harsh to the world, then you need to nourish it. That means being intentional in what you eat and how you move. You don’t have to go on a diet, but you have to pay attention to your fullness. You know when children leave food on their plate at the end of the day and it makes you feel frustrated? Well, that’s because you’ve been taught to clear your plate to be polite. That means that for years and years you’ve been pushing past your fullness signals and eating anyway even when you’re already satisfied. How is that making you feel? The likelihood is it doesn’t make you feel very good. You can claw that back and relearn those habits that children seem to manage.
Practice gratitude.
Have you ever out loud told your body that you’re thankful for the way that it helps you to breathe and the way that your heart beats? Have you thank your body for the skin care that you give it and the food that you nourish it with? Is so much more helpful to think about what our bodies can do for us on a daily basis rather than what they are limited to. If you are currently overweight you may be constantly criticizing your body, in the same way you would if you were underweight. Disordered eating is disordered eating no matter which way you swing it, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be grateful for the way your body is working for you right now.
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