Being a good parent isn’t about how much money you can spend or the toys and treats that your children get from you. That’s not the important part. Yes, it’s nice to buy things for the little ones, but there are many more qualities of a good parent that should come first. Bringing up children who are kind, compassionate, cheerful, empathetic, and who can look after themselves with confidence is what parenting is all about.
Be Loving
Kids need love. It’s the most important thing you can give them, and it will make them into a wonderful adult. Being loving and affectionate as you give guidance and instruction will make for happy children who also do as you ask of them without talking back and lashing out.
Love means respecting, encouraging, and nurturing your children, not judging or blaming them when something goes wrong (as it often will). This love needs to be constantly affirmed – you can do this with words and actions, but you don’t need to buy presents all the time to show them you love them.
Be Prepared
Whether that’s making sure that you never run out of baby wipes and diapers, or having life insurance, a will, and carrying out estate planning so that your kids will be provided for should the worst happen, being prepared is something that all good parents will need to learn. However, it’s not something that all parents will instinctively know how to do – it’s a matter of learning as you go, and soon enough, you’ll understand what’s essential and what’s not, and what you will need to think ahead about, and what you can leave to chance.
Stress Management
Being a parent is a stressful job, and tempers can often fray. The key to being a good parent is managing that stress so that, even when you are frustrated and irritated, your children don’t bear the brunt of your feelings. This might mean taking some time out for yourself to read a book, listen to music, meditate, or enjoy a copycat Starbucks chai (tea) latte if that’s what makes you feel better.
Children learn their own emotions by mirroring their parents, and therefore trying to keep as calm as possible is essential in bringing up well-adjusted children. Parents who complain to their children (or even their partner within earshot of the children) about a bad day at work, an argument they had with a neighbor, or who use foul language are bad examples for their children. Not only that, but it could cause your children to feel less secure.
Communication
Parents who are able to skilfully communicate with their children and show a genuine interest in what they are doing and how they are feeling are good parents. It shows that you are always there for the children and that you respect them, and this will make for a happy, well-rounded child growing up and a productive member of society when they are adults.
Encourage your child to talk to you about everything, including their feelings and what they are going through. Explain the reasons behind the rules instead of just telling them to do whatever you asked because you said so. Let them know you understand what they are going through or how they are feeling.
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