When your teenager decides they want to live independently and mention moving out, it might set off a few alarm bells in your head. After all, it seemed only a moment ago that they were a child who needed you to tie their shoelaces for them! But now they’re nearing 18, and whether or not they want to go to college, they definitely seem to be keen on living someplace of their own.
Approaching this conversation with the right attitude is key. You don’t want to scare them off of standing on their own two feet, but you do want them to understand what it’s going to take. You also don’t want them to feel like you’re just nagging them or trying to treat them like a kid!
That’s why we recommend touching on the three things below to help them form a proper plan and make moving out as smooth as can be.
Where They Want to Live
If your teen wants to move out, the first thing to gauge is what they’re looking for in their first home. For example, do they want a studio space or are they more interested in loft apartments? And what features do they really want, like a good view or being close to downtown?
These talks can be silly, but take your teen’s interests seriously. Each teenager has a different idea of what it means to move out, and getting them to talk about the space they want to live in will clue you into what they expect from independent living. From here you can give them a better idea of what it might be like.
How They’ll Pay Rent
This is probably going to be the question you want answers to the most. If they want to move out soon, and they don’t have a job or seem to have any savings, how are they going to pay rent? Of course, you may be willing to help them get on their feet and provide a safety net for the first couple of months, but what about beyond this?
Don’t approach this topic with judgement. Be genuinely curious and ask your teen how they’re going to approach the bills. What will be the max rent amount they think they can manage? If they need to get a roommate, will that be OK with them?
What to Do in Emergencies
Emergencies are scary enough when you’re all together in the family home, but when your teenager is out there living alone and the fire alarm goes off, you need to be sure they know what to do.
Go through a few drills with them, just for your own peace of mind. Emergencies can quickly turn dangerous if they’re not reacted to, and you want to be sure your teen knows the basics of evacuating, finding help, and making sure they’re not injured.
If your teenager has been talking about moving out, get them prepped with a conversation like this.
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